I NEED MUSCLES

Inspirations for blogs come at the strangest moments. I was in the tree pose in yoga class,back aching and tummy trembling. I looked at the skinny male instructor executing each pose with ease and remembered I used to teach an aerobics class back in the 80’s. (Sidebar: If I were a heterosexual man in the back of a yoga class, I’d be in ass heaven There were only three guys in the class today and they were further back in the room than me!) The music of Inda Arie was gently taking me to that place in the practice where we say “namaste” (I bow to you) but my mind wanderd to Diana Ross, Muscles:

She said she wants a man to always understand

But that's alright for her, still it ain't enough for me

She said she wants a guy to keep her satisfied

But that's alright for her, but it ain't enough for me

They say they have to see his real personality

But that's alright for them, still it ain't enough for me

I need what the eyes can see, ah

(HIS ANATOMY)

My fellow blogger Corey Jarrell hit me up the other day humorously frustrated by the slim attractive looks of these young boys now-a-days. It was ironic that I was in the second week of my dedicated 5 days a week commitment to the gym. I had been going irregularly. Mostly I go to my yoga class on Thursdays and Sundays and since I bought my new Vibrams, (great for walking, hiking or jogging. My legs really feel the burn)

I’d been doing a 30 minute treadmill with Supremes disco mixes on my IPod. I recently had a rude awakening. My weight, which had stabilized at 216lbs, suddenly jumped 7 lbs to 223lbs! Then I read a Facebook posting from my diva girl Mashica who said that Satan had recently jumped on her scale and was exactly seven pounds! I upped my cardio to 60 minutes and went back to circuit weights! This was as scary as those bedbugs infesting all across the country!

If that's alright for them, still it ain't enough for me

I don't care if he's young or old, just make him beautiful

I just want some strong man to hold on to,

I want MUSCLES

Now I can admire a muscle man on television and magazines all day long, but when it comes to “luvin” in the bedroom, I LOVES me some chubby men. I loves me sum chubby, BUT I do not want to be chubby. I know it sounds weird in the body-obsessed society we live in. I am an admitted chubby chaser. I like my men to have a little jiggle in their swagger. I prefer to rub a round tummy like a Buddha for good luck. Man boobs are a turn-on. Rock hard abs, sculpted arms and an ass to bounce a dime off are great at a strip show, but in bed, I need to feel flesh that moves. I even recorded a poem about it (“Big Boiz” click #6 on the Sound Click player to the right):

Make him strong enough from his head down to his toes 

And don’t get me to talking about toes! During my shallow years, my friends can testify I have dated some awful men just because they had pretty feet and let some of the most wonderful guys pass me by because of some jacked-up toes!

Muscle man, I want to love you in the sun, oil on your body

Come with me, high in the cascades

Let this be, we've got this thing made

Lost at sea, hide the desert

Stay with me, you won't regret it

Take this love, so deep to swim in

Come to me, and let the love in

She said she wants a man to always understand

But that's alright for her still it ain't enough for me

I don't care if he's young or old

(Just make him beautiful)

I used to tell people years ago the other thing Oprah and me had in common besides Baltimore was the fact our weight zoomed up and down. During my adult years, I watched my waist go from 29 inches to 38 inches. During my modeling years, I worked as a fit sample model. I could wear the sample suits right off the racks for the buyer’s shows. Then I got into a relationship. When you are attracted to thick boys, you forget part of the courtship involves eating. I like my thick boys (and girls) happy and food makes them happy, so we eat! Two years with my wife gained me 20lbs, which I lost after the divorce, but the next seven with my partner had me finding that 20 plus 10 more pounds over the course of that roller-coaster ride of a relationship. That became my pattern. Lose the weight and find a thick sexy man and then get happy and gain the weight back.


By the time I hit my forties the additional factors of high blood pressure and cholesterol added risk factors that made losing weight more of a necessity than a pleasure principal. The only difference this time was as you get older, dropping weight is a bit more of a challenge. Less physical social activity like going to the disco, teaching aerobic classes and biking to work and more social activity like good red wine, cheese, red velvet cake and feeding ya man chocolate covered strawberries in bed became the norm. A few years ago, I grabbed hold of my waistline and did a reality show called Ship Up Shape Out and lost some weight on a seven day cruise to lose.



It is time to get those disciplines back. The weight crept up on me this time and I wasn’t even in love! NOW I’ve got to work that body. Now whenever a dude hits on me and asks “Why is a nice guy like you single?” I have to be honest and answer, “Being single is healthier for me, I eat less, exercise more and I can get into my favorite clothes.” I still crave my big boiz, but I can even only have them in moderation…30minsB4midnight

Still, I don't care if he's young or old

(Just make him BIG & Beautiful)

I just want someone I can hold on to!!